Friday, July 11, 2008
In the Final Issue of Florentine Braheem
* Sicily and Amalfi (The beginning of the end)
* Our Last Day (Saying Goodbye)
* The Final Interview with Anna
* One Final Tuscan Photo Journey
* The Kids, What they Learned (A Final Interview)
* Lo Sport (Calcio Storico)
* An Italian Wedding
* Final Reflections on a Magical Year
* Our Last Day (Saying Goodbye)
* The Final Interview with Anna
* One Final Tuscan Photo Journey
* The Kids, What they Learned (A Final Interview)
* Lo Sport (Calcio Storico)
* An Italian Wedding
* Final Reflections on a Magical Year
Sicily and Amalfi (The beginning of the end)
Several months ago, as we assessed the final weeks of our adventure, Anna and I agreed that we would like to do a little more exploring with the kids out of school. As we evaluated the numerous possibilities (France, Switzerland, Germany, Spain and like) Anna continued to hold firm in her belief that this was “The year of Italy” and we should make sure that we see as much of this country as possible.
I have always wanted to visit Sicily, a land that so few Americans ever get to see due to its remote location. The Amalfi Coast is legendary as one of the great seaside destinations in Europe. The two would become the setting for our final adventure before returning for one final week in Florence and then back to the United States…
Sicily – I have often wondered why Sicilians are so passionate about NOT being called Italian. They are steadfast that there is a difference between them and Italians. Most Americans associate Sicilians with the mafia, partly due to the movie the Godfather and partly because Palermo and Catania (And therefore the entire island) are to this day run by organized crime families!
The truth is that Sicily is about so much more than the Mafia and Sicilian people have every right to request that they be referred to differently than Italians. Sicily is governed by Italy but that is where the similarities really begin and end. To better understand Sicily and its history, one must first understand the importance of its strategic location in history.
The island is quite large (It takes six hours to drive from the west coast to the east coast non stop) and lies in the middle of the Mediterranean, some 3 miles South of the boot of Italy and only 45 miles North of the Coast of Africa (Tunisia). On a clear day, from her Southern beaches, you can see North Africa on the horizon, a very cool site indeed!
The first great civilization to occupy Sicily was the Greeks, who settled the island in about 600 BC. They erected some of the most impressive Greek temples in the world and to this day, one could say that Greek archeological sites in Sicily are more impressive and better preserved than that of Greece itself! Following the reign of the Greeks, Sicily was taken over by the Romans who occupied Sicily for nearly 600 years beginning in about 200 BC. The island then briefly fell into the hands of the Germans who conquered the Roman Empire in about 440 AD. The longest period of foreign rule in Sicily was held by the Muslims of North Africa and Byzantine, for a period of nearly 800 years beginning in around 500 AD. It is they who have had perhaps the greatest influence on Sicilian culture.
When you put all of these cultural and religious ingredients together you have a truly unique place and it’s reflected in the architecture, the food (Which is an eclectic mix of Italian and Arabic) and the people.
It’s too difficult to experience all of Sicily in just one trip, so we selected certain spots that would provide us with a true feel…
Our journey began on the South West Coast of Sicily near the town of Marsalla, where the world famous Marsalla wine is produced. This area of the island was sparse and desolate with small towns intermittently dispersed on the dried out landscape. In many ways reminded us of being in a California desert town such as Baker or Barstow and was not at all what we expected. During our time in this area we visited a salt flat where sea salt has been made for over three thousand years and ancient Greek Ruins which were amazing. The hotel we stayed at was wonderful however, and the weather (Hot and Dry) was a welcome break to the horrible humidity of Florence. Much of our time was spent poolside relaxing with the kids.
Our next location was in the South Eastern part of the island near the town of Ragusa. Mid way through the five plus hour drive we stopped at one of the great archeological sites of the Mediterranean known as “The Valley of the Temples” near the town of Agrigento. The Valley of the Temples dates back to the Greek occupation of the island some 2500 years ago and many of the temples are in near perfect condition. We hired a tour guide to help us make our way through the ancient buildings and to share the rich history of the area. It was quite a treat (See photos)
The landscape in this area of the island is what I had imagined in my visions of Sicily. Long winding roads through farm country with tall golden wheat grass, olive trees and grape vines checkering the landscape. Stone walls as far as the eye could see that have been there for hundreds of years delineating the separation between you and your neighbor, no mortar necessary, only accurate stacking.
Sicily is exactly how it was hundreds of years ago, and in that regard it is truly “Old Italy’. This is a part of its charm. Shops still close for three to four hours during lunch time. Residents still take a long siesta after a long lunch. The people still live off the land in many ways by growing their own crops and fishing the Mediterranean. It’s a place that makes the mainland of Italy look like it’s in a hurry!
The towns of Ragusa and Noto were amazingly charming places, rich in history and boasting great architecture. Great portions of these two ancient cities are built directly into the rock hillside.
We spent a couple of days at the beach while in this part of the island as the warm summer days left us craving the water of the Mediterranean. The beaches here are hands down better than any I have seen in this part of the world. So many times we have visited places like Greece, Croatia and the South of France only to leave disappointed. In this part of the world, beaches are often made of stones and of course there are no waves. In Sicily, the beaches were beautiful sand and the water was clear and warm. We were pleasantly surprised.
Granita – It would be impossible to talk about Sicily and not mention granita. Granita is to Sicily what gelato is to Italy and we’re convinced that granita is even better! Granita is a semi-frozen desert of sugar, water and flavoring (Often with fresh fruit). It’s about the thickness of a Jamba Juice and a hell of a lot better as the flavors are so fresh and natural. By far my favorite flavor was Mandrala (Almond) which had almond shavings in it. The kids loved it too, but also devoured lemon, tangerine and strawberry. Anna favorite was pistachio and we both absolutely loved café, which is made with fresh espresso. One of the famous Sicilian breakfasts is café granita and a pastry!
After leaving Ragusa we headed North to the famous tourist destination of Taormina. There’s certainly good reason for Taormina’s appeal as it’s truly one of the loveliest places that we have been. The city itself is an ancient Greek village that sits high on a cliff overlooking the sea. What makes it even more dramatic is that it lies in the shadow of the largest volcano in Europe Mount Etna, which is still active (It was actually flowing lava when we drove past it on the highway) The coast line in this area is beautiful and dramatic as well, making it the perfect final stop on our tour of Sicily.
Following a day at the pool we made our way to dinner. When I sat down, I noticed a cramping pain in my lower right abdomen. It was a pain that I had felt before and I immediately became concerned. Hoping that it was only gas pains, I proceeded to eat a decent portion of my dinner. As the night evolved, I realized that my biggest fear was being realized. I had an intestinal blockage a very serious and dangerous situation…
Five years ago I had an emergency appendectomy. It was rather severe and I was in the hospital for two weeks. Laparoscopic surgery was aborted by my doctor due to severe peritonitis and my abdomen was completely cut open. The result is a very long scar from my navel to my pelvis and a lot of scar tissue inside my belly.
One year after the appendix operation, I had to be rushed to emergency for immediate surgery as the scar tissue had wrapped itself around my intestines and created a complete blockage (A very dangerous situation if not taken care of immediately).
As the night evolved into the morning and the cramping persisted, my abdomen began to swell substantially and become distended. By 10:00 am it was time to go to the hospital as it became clear that I was not getting better, but rather worse. The only question in my mind at this point was whether I would need surgery or if the blockage would release itself by becoming untwisted from the scar tissue.
Time in a Sicilian emergency room was nothing like what I was used to. I sat in a wheel chair for nearly three hours before anyone attended to me. Sitting is not exactly my preferred position when I have severe abdominal cramping. In fact, I was craving for some pain medication.
All around me were sick people, several of them very very old. In our time in Italian hospitals I have concluded that old Italian people must think that there is some correlation between the healing process and moaning in agony! Imagine sitting in an emergency room in pain for several hours surrounded by several elderly Italians who are moaning and screaming at the top of their lungs, praying to Jesus and cursing their doctors in the same breath. It was definitely a day that I don’t want to relive.
I was finally taken in to one of the rooms and given an IV at about 1:00 as I was really low on fluid. As the morning ended and the afternoon took hold, it was apparent I would be there for a while. Finally by about 4:00 I was taken in for x-rays. Following the radiologist review I was taken to one of the hospital beds on the second floor and a whole team of doctors (None of which spoke any English) were now attending to me and asking me questions. They were finally taking this situation seriously.
My Italian is damn good in a restaurant at this point, but is sorely lacking when it comes to medical vernacular. What I was able to discern from the conversation was that they wanted me to stay overnight for observation and that “IF” the blockage did not release, that they would want to do surgery the next day and “MIGHT” have to open me all the way up again if a laparoscope didn’t do the trick.
When I heard “Opening me all the way Up” my concerns became pronounced. “In Ospedale per un settimana” I asked the doctor (In the hospital for one week?). He nodded yes…
My mind started racing. “This is a tourist town, there will be no hotels available for Anna and the kids as its high season. What will Anna and kids do for one week if I am in here? Do I trust these people? Why would they need to open me all the way up? What am I going to do? There’s no one to help Anna down here…”
“Voglio venire all’ albergo” (I want to go to the hotel) I told the doctor. One hour later and much to the doctors disappointment, I was released…
Once back at the hotel, we immediately jumped on line and started looking for flights back to Florence. Florence seemed so much safer to me. We have friends there. I know doctors there. Anna could be in the comforts of the castle there. It would be better for her and the kids there…
I new that if I didn’t eat anything all night that the chances of anything bad happening were slim and that there was a chance that the intestine would release itself from the grasp of the scar tissue.
By the next morning, my belly had decreased in size by about fifty percent and my cramping was much less, but I was very tired and weak. We managed to get a morning direct flight to Florence. We checked out of our hotel two days early and flew back to familiar ground.
As the day evolved at the castle, I rested and continued to feel a bit better. I was able to eat a bit of pasta and some yogurt and soup. If no further cramping occurred, it would mean that the blockage was now cleared and I would be OK for the time being. If by tomorrow morning I felt better, then we could take the three hour train ride to our next destination, the Amalfi Coast. Our vacation would only have been hampered to the tune of two days in Sicily and we could finish the remainder of our vacation in the South of Italy as planned.
If all went well in Amalfi, we could return back to the castle for one final week in Florence. We could say goodbye to our friends and the city they way we have planned. We would be coming home on the 11th of July, less than two weeks away…So many “If’s”…
All night Anna and I weighed the pros and cons of going to Amalfi for five days. What if another blockage happened? Did I want to be in a hospital in Amalfi? Could we get back to Florence in time to go to the hospital there? Should we just stay in Florence and play it safe? Should we go home to Los Angeles early? What about all the money we would need to pay for new airline tickets? What about the money that we would lose on our hotel reservations...
I called Mark Tyron that night to ask him for advice. He was a big help in helping me talk through the options.
As I went to bed that night, my mind was maxed out with all the decisions that needed to be made. As we talked in the dark, Anna and I decided that if I felt better in the morning we would go to Amalfi and roll the dice. I would watch what I eat and take it slow. If I didn’t feel better I would go to the hospital in Florence and have the surgery done there.
We rested well that night as we were so tired…
I have always wanted to visit Sicily, a land that so few Americans ever get to see due to its remote location. The Amalfi Coast is legendary as one of the great seaside destinations in Europe. The two would become the setting for our final adventure before returning for one final week in Florence and then back to the United States…
Sicily – I have often wondered why Sicilians are so passionate about NOT being called Italian. They are steadfast that there is a difference between them and Italians. Most Americans associate Sicilians with the mafia, partly due to the movie the Godfather and partly because Palermo and Catania (And therefore the entire island) are to this day run by organized crime families!
The truth is that Sicily is about so much more than the Mafia and Sicilian people have every right to request that they be referred to differently than Italians. Sicily is governed by Italy but that is where the similarities really begin and end. To better understand Sicily and its history, one must first understand the importance of its strategic location in history.
The island is quite large (It takes six hours to drive from the west coast to the east coast non stop) and lies in the middle of the Mediterranean, some 3 miles South of the boot of Italy and only 45 miles North of the Coast of Africa (Tunisia). On a clear day, from her Southern beaches, you can see North Africa on the horizon, a very cool site indeed!
The first great civilization to occupy Sicily was the Greeks, who settled the island in about 600 BC. They erected some of the most impressive Greek temples in the world and to this day, one could say that Greek archeological sites in Sicily are more impressive and better preserved than that of Greece itself! Following the reign of the Greeks, Sicily was taken over by the Romans who occupied Sicily for nearly 600 years beginning in about 200 BC. The island then briefly fell into the hands of the Germans who conquered the Roman Empire in about 440 AD. The longest period of foreign rule in Sicily was held by the Muslims of North Africa and Byzantine, for a period of nearly 800 years beginning in around 500 AD. It is they who have had perhaps the greatest influence on Sicilian culture.
When you put all of these cultural and religious ingredients together you have a truly unique place and it’s reflected in the architecture, the food (Which is an eclectic mix of Italian and Arabic) and the people.
It’s too difficult to experience all of Sicily in just one trip, so we selected certain spots that would provide us with a true feel…
Our journey began on the South West Coast of Sicily near the town of Marsalla, where the world famous Marsalla wine is produced. This area of the island was sparse and desolate with small towns intermittently dispersed on the dried out landscape. In many ways reminded us of being in a California desert town such as Baker or Barstow and was not at all what we expected. During our time in this area we visited a salt flat where sea salt has been made for over three thousand years and ancient Greek Ruins which were amazing. The hotel we stayed at was wonderful however, and the weather (Hot and Dry) was a welcome break to the horrible humidity of Florence. Much of our time was spent poolside relaxing with the kids.
Our next location was in the South Eastern part of the island near the town of Ragusa. Mid way through the five plus hour drive we stopped at one of the great archeological sites of the Mediterranean known as “The Valley of the Temples” near the town of Agrigento. The Valley of the Temples dates back to the Greek occupation of the island some 2500 years ago and many of the temples are in near perfect condition. We hired a tour guide to help us make our way through the ancient buildings and to share the rich history of the area. It was quite a treat (See photos)
The landscape in this area of the island is what I had imagined in my visions of Sicily. Long winding roads through farm country with tall golden wheat grass, olive trees and grape vines checkering the landscape. Stone walls as far as the eye could see that have been there for hundreds of years delineating the separation between you and your neighbor, no mortar necessary, only accurate stacking.
Sicily is exactly how it was hundreds of years ago, and in that regard it is truly “Old Italy’. This is a part of its charm. Shops still close for three to four hours during lunch time. Residents still take a long siesta after a long lunch. The people still live off the land in many ways by growing their own crops and fishing the Mediterranean. It’s a place that makes the mainland of Italy look like it’s in a hurry!
The towns of Ragusa and Noto were amazingly charming places, rich in history and boasting great architecture. Great portions of these two ancient cities are built directly into the rock hillside.
We spent a couple of days at the beach while in this part of the island as the warm summer days left us craving the water of the Mediterranean. The beaches here are hands down better than any I have seen in this part of the world. So many times we have visited places like Greece, Croatia and the South of France only to leave disappointed. In this part of the world, beaches are often made of stones and of course there are no waves. In Sicily, the beaches were beautiful sand and the water was clear and warm. We were pleasantly surprised.
Granita – It would be impossible to talk about Sicily and not mention granita. Granita is to Sicily what gelato is to Italy and we’re convinced that granita is even better! Granita is a semi-frozen desert of sugar, water and flavoring (Often with fresh fruit). It’s about the thickness of a Jamba Juice and a hell of a lot better as the flavors are so fresh and natural. By far my favorite flavor was Mandrala (Almond) which had almond shavings in it. The kids loved it too, but also devoured lemon, tangerine and strawberry. Anna favorite was pistachio and we both absolutely loved café, which is made with fresh espresso. One of the famous Sicilian breakfasts is café granita and a pastry!
After leaving Ragusa we headed North to the famous tourist destination of Taormina. There’s certainly good reason for Taormina’s appeal as it’s truly one of the loveliest places that we have been. The city itself is an ancient Greek village that sits high on a cliff overlooking the sea. What makes it even more dramatic is that it lies in the shadow of the largest volcano in Europe Mount Etna, which is still active (It was actually flowing lava when we drove past it on the highway) The coast line in this area is beautiful and dramatic as well, making it the perfect final stop on our tour of Sicily.
Following a day at the pool we made our way to dinner. When I sat down, I noticed a cramping pain in my lower right abdomen. It was a pain that I had felt before and I immediately became concerned. Hoping that it was only gas pains, I proceeded to eat a decent portion of my dinner. As the night evolved, I realized that my biggest fear was being realized. I had an intestinal blockage a very serious and dangerous situation…
Five years ago I had an emergency appendectomy. It was rather severe and I was in the hospital for two weeks. Laparoscopic surgery was aborted by my doctor due to severe peritonitis and my abdomen was completely cut open. The result is a very long scar from my navel to my pelvis and a lot of scar tissue inside my belly.
One year after the appendix operation, I had to be rushed to emergency for immediate surgery as the scar tissue had wrapped itself around my intestines and created a complete blockage (A very dangerous situation if not taken care of immediately).
As the night evolved into the morning and the cramping persisted, my abdomen began to swell substantially and become distended. By 10:00 am it was time to go to the hospital as it became clear that I was not getting better, but rather worse. The only question in my mind at this point was whether I would need surgery or if the blockage would release itself by becoming untwisted from the scar tissue.
Time in a Sicilian emergency room was nothing like what I was used to. I sat in a wheel chair for nearly three hours before anyone attended to me. Sitting is not exactly my preferred position when I have severe abdominal cramping. In fact, I was craving for some pain medication.
All around me were sick people, several of them very very old. In our time in Italian hospitals I have concluded that old Italian people must think that there is some correlation between the healing process and moaning in agony! Imagine sitting in an emergency room in pain for several hours surrounded by several elderly Italians who are moaning and screaming at the top of their lungs, praying to Jesus and cursing their doctors in the same breath. It was definitely a day that I don’t want to relive.
I was finally taken in to one of the rooms and given an IV at about 1:00 as I was really low on fluid. As the morning ended and the afternoon took hold, it was apparent I would be there for a while. Finally by about 4:00 I was taken in for x-rays. Following the radiologist review I was taken to one of the hospital beds on the second floor and a whole team of doctors (None of which spoke any English) were now attending to me and asking me questions. They were finally taking this situation seriously.
My Italian is damn good in a restaurant at this point, but is sorely lacking when it comes to medical vernacular. What I was able to discern from the conversation was that they wanted me to stay overnight for observation and that “IF” the blockage did not release, that they would want to do surgery the next day and “MIGHT” have to open me all the way up again if a laparoscope didn’t do the trick.
When I heard “Opening me all the way Up” my concerns became pronounced. “In Ospedale per un settimana” I asked the doctor (In the hospital for one week?). He nodded yes…
My mind started racing. “This is a tourist town, there will be no hotels available for Anna and the kids as its high season. What will Anna and kids do for one week if I am in here? Do I trust these people? Why would they need to open me all the way up? What am I going to do? There’s no one to help Anna down here…”
“Voglio venire all’ albergo” (I want to go to the hotel) I told the doctor. One hour later and much to the doctors disappointment, I was released…
Once back at the hotel, we immediately jumped on line and started looking for flights back to Florence. Florence seemed so much safer to me. We have friends there. I know doctors there. Anna could be in the comforts of the castle there. It would be better for her and the kids there…
I new that if I didn’t eat anything all night that the chances of anything bad happening were slim and that there was a chance that the intestine would release itself from the grasp of the scar tissue.
By the next morning, my belly had decreased in size by about fifty percent and my cramping was much less, but I was very tired and weak. We managed to get a morning direct flight to Florence. We checked out of our hotel two days early and flew back to familiar ground.
As the day evolved at the castle, I rested and continued to feel a bit better. I was able to eat a bit of pasta and some yogurt and soup. If no further cramping occurred, it would mean that the blockage was now cleared and I would be OK for the time being. If by tomorrow morning I felt better, then we could take the three hour train ride to our next destination, the Amalfi Coast. Our vacation would only have been hampered to the tune of two days in Sicily and we could finish the remainder of our vacation in the South of Italy as planned.
If all went well in Amalfi, we could return back to the castle for one final week in Florence. We could say goodbye to our friends and the city they way we have planned. We would be coming home on the 11th of July, less than two weeks away…So many “If’s”…
All night Anna and I weighed the pros and cons of going to Amalfi for five days. What if another blockage happened? Did I want to be in a hospital in Amalfi? Could we get back to Florence in time to go to the hospital there? Should we just stay in Florence and play it safe? Should we go home to Los Angeles early? What about all the money we would need to pay for new airline tickets? What about the money that we would lose on our hotel reservations...
I called Mark Tyron that night to ask him for advice. He was a big help in helping me talk through the options.
As I went to bed that night, my mind was maxed out with all the decisions that needed to be made. As we talked in the dark, Anna and I decided that if I felt better in the morning we would go to Amalfi and roll the dice. I would watch what I eat and take it slow. If I didn’t feel better I would go to the hospital in Florence and have the surgery done there.
We rested well that night as we were so tired…
Our Last Day...Saying Goodbye
The sun began to rise on and peaked its way through the curtains in our bedroom. It was 5:15 and I had been up for about fifteen minutes, thinking about the big decisions in front of us. My stomach was less distended this morning, the pain was slightly less severe, I had slept through the night without discomfort. Surely the pasta from yesterday afternoon had been digested. I decided to take a shower…
When I was done, I looked out at the beautiful morning view into the Italian countryside. The light was perfect and soft, birds were singing and racing past our bedroom window, I was happy to be at the castle again. This is our happy place. It has always felt like home to us.
I thought about my conversation last night with Mark Tyron. We discussed my health issue and my desires to stay in Italy for the duration. I just couldn’t see myself not saying goodbye to everyone and the city that we are still in love with. He had reminded me the night before that saying goodbye the way that I wanted to (Long lunches and dinner, plenty of glasses of wine and lots of laughs) might be a difficult thing if my mind were constantly fixated on the prospects having a complete blockage.
As I stared outside, the tears began to roll down my cheeks. “This is my last morning at the castle”, I thought. “Today we should go home”.
Over the past year, I have grown to appreciate so many things about living in Italy. This blog has covered them in great detail. On this fateful morning, I realized how much I loved America. The order and efficiency of life was something that I had a new appreciation for. America is home, not because I was born there or that I own a house there, but because it’s where my family and friends are. It was time to go home.
When I told Anna that I didn’t want to take the train to Amalfi, she was shocked. She wanted to sit down and talk about it. Upon explaining to her my reasons, she completely agreed. Italy was not where I wanted my family to be if I were to have surgery.
The next two hours were consumed with us frantically trying to change our airline reservations and cancelling the rest of our planned vacation in Amalfi. The people at Delta were so on top of it (Another reminder of the efficiencies of home) and we were able to make the change with only a small penalty. The only problem was that we were flying out that night at 6:50 and hadn’t even begun packing the house. We had so much to do and with so little time.
When we were done with the computers Trey logged on to his e-mail and sent the following to all of his friends in 24 point font “Huge Change of Plans, I’m coming home tomorrow!!!!!!” I was happy for the kids. All of their friends in Florence had either gone on vacation for the summer or had moved to another city after school let out. They had been such troopers during those early months when things were tough on them. It was time for them to enjoy their summer now too.
As we began packing in the sweltering heat of a Florence afternoon our thoughts quickly shifted to carving out time for the important goodbyes. I called Simone and Paolo and asked Giovanni to take us to the airport. Anna called Stella. We couldn’t possibly leave without saying goodbye to Alex and Antoinetta (His twin brother Davide and Helga were out of town so it would be impossible to say goodbye to them). One by one as we made the phone calls to our shocked friends, we heard the same thing “Che Cosa Successo”, what’s wrong? We did our best to explain the urgency and fear that we had about “Intestine Blocata” (Blocked intestines). They all completely understood our need to get home.
The first to arrive to say goodbye was Paolo. Having just finished his workout at the palestra, it was clear to me upon his arrival that our phone conversation had not been clearly understood by him. The look of surprise that crossed his face when he saw the luggage spread out and our apartment in disarray said it all.
The kids greeted him as they always do with big hugs. He clearly wanted to ask questions but really didn’t know where to begin as there is still a solid communication barrier between us. He just kept muttering “Che Picatta” what a shame, over and over. Then he turned his back and walked toward the terrace and started to cry. Seeing this wonderfully kind man who is as strong as an Ox break down, was more than we needed to allow our flood gates to open as well.
We hugged for a long time. He kissed the kids and Anna and then sat down to write us a final note. The contents of the note are personal and will be kept between us. It is one of the nicest heartfelt letters I have ever read. As I type this I’m unable to hold back the tears.
Simone was the next to arrive at around 2:00. He didn’t leave until we left for the airport at 5:00. He asked Trey to go downstairs with him and play catch with the tennis ball one final time and told Olivia one last time something that he has told her so many times before “Olivia you are so beautiful”. It was as if he was trying to hold on to every last moment before our time together would end.
Stella arrived at 3:00 with tears in her eyes. It was like being at a funeral, we were all so sad. She too stayed until we left, helping us as she always does with anything that we needed. Her eyes were constantly fixated on the kids, who she loves like a grandmother.
Alex and Antonietta stopped by for a short period, sensing the chaos of our crowded house. Alex and Davide are two of the most jovial people that I have ever met, constantly cracking jokes and making us laugh. Alex did a good job of keeping things light, but even the guy who jokes that he eats Nutella with “Trippa” (Cow stomach) for breakfast every morning, couldn’t hold the tears back from welling up in his eyes. Antonietta on the other hand was a waterfall. She’s one of the sweetest ladies I have ever met and her emotions were in control of her that afternoon.
When Giovanni arrived to pick us up, he bounced out of the van with upbeat enthusiasm in his step. “Don’t be down, it will be OK he said to me. It could have happened after you were here for only a few months. At least it was near the end.”
Giovanni and I have had many serious discussions together and if there is one thing that he battles with every day is his ability to stay positive. I’ve fed him a heavy diet of Tony Robbins and other positive motivators over the past year and the irony of him trying to pick me up in this time of sadness brought our friendship full circle.
“Your not going to make me sad today Tim. I’m not going to be down” he kept telling me.
As we loaded the car it was time to say goodbye to Simone and Stella, two people that we saw three to four times a week. The tears flowed even harder as we embraced in long hugs. “Ti Voglio bene” was whispered into each others ears. In Italy, you save the phrase “Ti Amo” (I love you) for only those that you are truly intimate with (Spouse and close family). When you want to say “I love you to a friend” its ti voglio bene, which means “I always want the best for you”. I will never forget the hug between Anna and Stella, the two embraced for a long time. They are good friends…
The drive to the airport was filled with text messages and phone calls to people who we had not had time to call earlier that day. Our emotions were drained.
Giovanni kept looking back at the kids. This was their last bus ride with him. “Olly, you’re my principessa and I’m your Big Fat Savage Potato right?” The kids laughed.
Upon arrival at the airport, something ironic happened. The skies opened up with a summer thunder storm like no other, dumping at least a couple of inches of rain in a half hour. What made this so ironic was that the day we arrived in Florence (August 8th of last year) we had to circle above the city for nearly a half hour due to the exact same occurrence. It was like the year had come full circle.
Givoanni had one last gift for the kids and he saved his greatest for last. The past nine months have seen him take the kids to and from school most every day (Simone brought them home on Monday and Friday). He clearly had a fondness for the kids, treating them to gelato after school on several occasions and baking them cakes and pastries often times for their after school snack. This final gift was truly special as he had two customized polo shirts made for both of them, with customized silkscreen logos (The logos are of personal things between him and the kids that you will have to ask them about). The kids wear their two shirts more than any other that they own. In fact they didn’t take them off for four days after we got home to California!
As we walked to the radar machines, Giovanni put his arm around me and said “You know how you are always thanking me for taking care of your kids?”
“Yeah”, I replied.
“You know how I always tell you to stop thanking me?”
“Yeah”
“Well the reason that I don’t want you to thank me is because “I” should be thanking them. They changed my life. When I started driving them, I was in a bad place in my life. I was depressed and always down. I didn’t know how to get out of the hole I was in. They saved me. Your two wonderful children were the highlight of my life. Every day they picked me up and made me smile. I will miss them, but they saved my life! This is why I don’t want you to thank me.”
We hugged for a long time. “Ti voglio bene amico mio, ti voglio bene”.
As we walked through the radar screens the tears were pouring down mine and Anna’s cheeks. I was delayed by one of the airport security workers who wanted to check the contents of my bag. While I was waiting, I looked back beyond the ropes of the mettle detector and saw Giovanni and his wonderful girlfriend Sonya with their arms around each other. He was crying. All day he managed to be strong for me, but his strength succumbed to his own emotions.
I waved one final time goodbye.
As we sat on the runway, I looked out across the grass field that runs adjacent. “This is it, its over” I thought. It ended so fast. There was no final dinner at La Vecchia Bettola, where we always felt like we were family. I never got to have one final ride through the city with Anna and the kids on the motorino. There was no final workout and round of goodbyes at the palestra. No final walk as a family over the arno, like I had played out in my mind…
No, because this is life and the beauty of life is that you never know what’s really going to happen or what plans will be fulfilled. All you can ever really count on is “right now”.
There were many times over the past month where I subconsciously started to “Detach” from my life in Italy. My subconscious mind was trying to protect me from the pain of having to say goodbye. Each time as I started to detach and distance myself from my friends and the city that we love, I couldn’t. I realized that I needed to enjoy the time that I have with them even though it was coming to an end soon. I these people as my friends for the rest of my life. They are what made Italy a special place for us in so many ways.
The life that we lived over these past 11 months is filled with memories that we will never forget. Please don’t think for a second that we take for granted how blessed we are to have experienced the gift of this past year. I’ve lost count of how many times Anna and I looked at each other with a smile and said “Don’t pinch me, I don’t want to wake up!”
The time to wake up finally had arrived….the slumber had been glorious.
When I was done, I looked out at the beautiful morning view into the Italian countryside. The light was perfect and soft, birds were singing and racing past our bedroom window, I was happy to be at the castle again. This is our happy place. It has always felt like home to us.
I thought about my conversation last night with Mark Tyron. We discussed my health issue and my desires to stay in Italy for the duration. I just couldn’t see myself not saying goodbye to everyone and the city that we are still in love with. He had reminded me the night before that saying goodbye the way that I wanted to (Long lunches and dinner, plenty of glasses of wine and lots of laughs) might be a difficult thing if my mind were constantly fixated on the prospects having a complete blockage.
As I stared outside, the tears began to roll down my cheeks. “This is my last morning at the castle”, I thought. “Today we should go home”.
Over the past year, I have grown to appreciate so many things about living in Italy. This blog has covered them in great detail. On this fateful morning, I realized how much I loved America. The order and efficiency of life was something that I had a new appreciation for. America is home, not because I was born there or that I own a house there, but because it’s where my family and friends are. It was time to go home.
When I told Anna that I didn’t want to take the train to Amalfi, she was shocked. She wanted to sit down and talk about it. Upon explaining to her my reasons, she completely agreed. Italy was not where I wanted my family to be if I were to have surgery.
The next two hours were consumed with us frantically trying to change our airline reservations and cancelling the rest of our planned vacation in Amalfi. The people at Delta were so on top of it (Another reminder of the efficiencies of home) and we were able to make the change with only a small penalty. The only problem was that we were flying out that night at 6:50 and hadn’t even begun packing the house. We had so much to do and with so little time.
When we were done with the computers Trey logged on to his e-mail and sent the following to all of his friends in 24 point font “Huge Change of Plans, I’m coming home tomorrow!!!!!!” I was happy for the kids. All of their friends in Florence had either gone on vacation for the summer or had moved to another city after school let out. They had been such troopers during those early months when things were tough on them. It was time for them to enjoy their summer now too.
As we began packing in the sweltering heat of a Florence afternoon our thoughts quickly shifted to carving out time for the important goodbyes. I called Simone and Paolo and asked Giovanni to take us to the airport. Anna called Stella. We couldn’t possibly leave without saying goodbye to Alex and Antoinetta (His twin brother Davide and Helga were out of town so it would be impossible to say goodbye to them). One by one as we made the phone calls to our shocked friends, we heard the same thing “Che Cosa Successo”, what’s wrong? We did our best to explain the urgency and fear that we had about “Intestine Blocata” (Blocked intestines). They all completely understood our need to get home.
The first to arrive to say goodbye was Paolo. Having just finished his workout at the palestra, it was clear to me upon his arrival that our phone conversation had not been clearly understood by him. The look of surprise that crossed his face when he saw the luggage spread out and our apartment in disarray said it all.
The kids greeted him as they always do with big hugs. He clearly wanted to ask questions but really didn’t know where to begin as there is still a solid communication barrier between us. He just kept muttering “Che Picatta” what a shame, over and over. Then he turned his back and walked toward the terrace and started to cry. Seeing this wonderfully kind man who is as strong as an Ox break down, was more than we needed to allow our flood gates to open as well.
We hugged for a long time. He kissed the kids and Anna and then sat down to write us a final note. The contents of the note are personal and will be kept between us. It is one of the nicest heartfelt letters I have ever read. As I type this I’m unable to hold back the tears.
Simone was the next to arrive at around 2:00. He didn’t leave until we left for the airport at 5:00. He asked Trey to go downstairs with him and play catch with the tennis ball one final time and told Olivia one last time something that he has told her so many times before “Olivia you are so beautiful”. It was as if he was trying to hold on to every last moment before our time together would end.
Stella arrived at 3:00 with tears in her eyes. It was like being at a funeral, we were all so sad. She too stayed until we left, helping us as she always does with anything that we needed. Her eyes were constantly fixated on the kids, who she loves like a grandmother.
Alex and Antonietta stopped by for a short period, sensing the chaos of our crowded house. Alex and Davide are two of the most jovial people that I have ever met, constantly cracking jokes and making us laugh. Alex did a good job of keeping things light, but even the guy who jokes that he eats Nutella with “Trippa” (Cow stomach) for breakfast every morning, couldn’t hold the tears back from welling up in his eyes. Antonietta on the other hand was a waterfall. She’s one of the sweetest ladies I have ever met and her emotions were in control of her that afternoon.
When Giovanni arrived to pick us up, he bounced out of the van with upbeat enthusiasm in his step. “Don’t be down, it will be OK he said to me. It could have happened after you were here for only a few months. At least it was near the end.”
Giovanni and I have had many serious discussions together and if there is one thing that he battles with every day is his ability to stay positive. I’ve fed him a heavy diet of Tony Robbins and other positive motivators over the past year and the irony of him trying to pick me up in this time of sadness brought our friendship full circle.
“Your not going to make me sad today Tim. I’m not going to be down” he kept telling me.
As we loaded the car it was time to say goodbye to Simone and Stella, two people that we saw three to four times a week. The tears flowed even harder as we embraced in long hugs. “Ti Voglio bene” was whispered into each others ears. In Italy, you save the phrase “Ti Amo” (I love you) for only those that you are truly intimate with (Spouse and close family). When you want to say “I love you to a friend” its ti voglio bene, which means “I always want the best for you”. I will never forget the hug between Anna and Stella, the two embraced for a long time. They are good friends…
The drive to the airport was filled with text messages and phone calls to people who we had not had time to call earlier that day. Our emotions were drained.
Giovanni kept looking back at the kids. This was their last bus ride with him. “Olly, you’re my principessa and I’m your Big Fat Savage Potato right?” The kids laughed.
Upon arrival at the airport, something ironic happened. The skies opened up with a summer thunder storm like no other, dumping at least a couple of inches of rain in a half hour. What made this so ironic was that the day we arrived in Florence (August 8th of last year) we had to circle above the city for nearly a half hour due to the exact same occurrence. It was like the year had come full circle.
Givoanni had one last gift for the kids and he saved his greatest for last. The past nine months have seen him take the kids to and from school most every day (Simone brought them home on Monday and Friday). He clearly had a fondness for the kids, treating them to gelato after school on several occasions and baking them cakes and pastries often times for their after school snack. This final gift was truly special as he had two customized polo shirts made for both of them, with customized silkscreen logos (The logos are of personal things between him and the kids that you will have to ask them about). The kids wear their two shirts more than any other that they own. In fact they didn’t take them off for four days after we got home to California!
As we walked to the radar machines, Giovanni put his arm around me and said “You know how you are always thanking me for taking care of your kids?”
“Yeah”, I replied.
“You know how I always tell you to stop thanking me?”
“Yeah”
“Well the reason that I don’t want you to thank me is because “I” should be thanking them. They changed my life. When I started driving them, I was in a bad place in my life. I was depressed and always down. I didn’t know how to get out of the hole I was in. They saved me. Your two wonderful children were the highlight of my life. Every day they picked me up and made me smile. I will miss them, but they saved my life! This is why I don’t want you to thank me.”
We hugged for a long time. “Ti voglio bene amico mio, ti voglio bene”.
As we walked through the radar screens the tears were pouring down mine and Anna’s cheeks. I was delayed by one of the airport security workers who wanted to check the contents of my bag. While I was waiting, I looked back beyond the ropes of the mettle detector and saw Giovanni and his wonderful girlfriend Sonya with their arms around each other. He was crying. All day he managed to be strong for me, but his strength succumbed to his own emotions.
I waved one final time goodbye.
As we sat on the runway, I looked out across the grass field that runs adjacent. “This is it, its over” I thought. It ended so fast. There was no final dinner at La Vecchia Bettola, where we always felt like we were family. I never got to have one final ride through the city with Anna and the kids on the motorino. There was no final workout and round of goodbyes at the palestra. No final walk as a family over the arno, like I had played out in my mind…
No, because this is life and the beauty of life is that you never know what’s really going to happen or what plans will be fulfilled. All you can ever really count on is “right now”.
There were many times over the past month where I subconsciously started to “Detach” from my life in Italy. My subconscious mind was trying to protect me from the pain of having to say goodbye. Each time as I started to detach and distance myself from my friends and the city that we love, I couldn’t. I realized that I needed to enjoy the time that I have with them even though it was coming to an end soon. I these people as my friends for the rest of my life. They are what made Italy a special place for us in so many ways.
The life that we lived over these past 11 months is filled with memories that we will never forget. Please don’t think for a second that we take for granted how blessed we are to have experienced the gift of this past year. I’ve lost count of how many times Anna and I looked at each other with a smile and said “Don’t pinch me, I don’t want to wake up!”
The time to wake up finally had arrived….the slumber had been glorious.
A Final Interview with Anna
Q1: If you had to assess how your kids have been affected (Both negative and positive) from living abroad over the past year, what would your assessment be?)
AA: As for the emotional aspect I don’t see a negative impact from living abroad this past year. I don’t view missing your family and friends as a negative. In my opinion it is s an experience in which we learn to recognize and go through what we are feeling. Once this happens and we experience the feelings, we ultimately grow from it. I’ve seen this process occur Trey and Olivia.
Trey and Olivia have had an incredible experience this year while in Italy. They have experienced a different life in a different land and have proven once again that they are amazing children who embraced this experience. They both grew immensely at ISF and both have told me that it is the best school they have ever gone to. Their appreciation for good, fresh, simply prepared food has changed them forever! So much so that they have their own opinions as to which restaurants serve the best pasta, rosticciana, steak, lamb, seafood etc. etc.! Consequently, they will also voice their opinion when the food is not to their satisfaction – this is fantastic for me! They both have developed an appreciation for the natural beauty of Italy, the soft rolling hills of the Tuscan country side, flowers in bloom and old rock walls. Trey takes in the architecture and Olivia chooses her favorite trees in the forest of the castle. Daily life for them was not the same “routine” as in Thousand Oaks. The strolls to dinner in the center, crossing the Arno, laughing with delight at how hard the rain is coming down on us while under our umbrellas, trying a new flavor in gelato……………….it has been life changing for them. Having a greater impact on them though is the friendships we have formed. Most of our friends do not speak English, and in the beginning it was a bit foreign for Trey and Olivia but as time passed, they discovered ways to communicate. TIC TAC TOE is a big one (just ask Olivia and the Mr. Italias!) The kids would often draw pictures for friends of ours who are special to them thereby communicating these feelings in a drawing. After time passes, you get to know someone without having to say it in words all the time because you can’t! You become more observant of body language, facial expressions and tend to look longer into their eyes and then you really know how they feel and with this brings comfort. Every time we are with our friends, they are very excited to see Trey and Olivia and they let it be known with big smiles and big hugs from the heart! Gifts are a big thing with the Italians we’ve befriended! Much to my disapproval, they would come with gifts in hand for the kids! I soon realized that is a sign of their fondness for the Trey and Olivia and therefore could not be disgruntled by it. Little gifts carefully thought out and from the heart.
Q2: You have said that you didn’t feel like you were “Finished” with Florence yet. Do you still feel that way?
AA: Yes, very much so. I feel as though my affair with Firenze and all it has for me is not over, this brings me comfort, knowing that I will be back.
Q3: How did your year in Italy differ from what you expected?
AA: Well, those who know me know I’m not one for expectations. I don’t get excited before a vacation.. The excitement for me happens as I am there, living it, feeling it. I don’t know how to have expectations from something I’ve never experienced before and don’t want to put expectations upon it for fear missing something because it wasn’t part of my expectations (does that make sense?) With that said, this has been to date one of the best years of my life.
Q4: If you could do it all over again, would you AND what would you do differently?
AA: Yes I would do it all over again. Differently? Some things would be different by default because we already have had the experience of living abroad therefore some things we are wiser to.
Q5: Who will you miss the most and why?
AA: For me it is impossible to be placed in a garden filled with beautiful flowers and asked to only choose one. Friends are like with flowers, beautiful and fragrant, touching your heart in their own unique way.
Q6: As you return home, what new wisdom do you bring with you that you will try to use to have a better life in California?
AA: I can’t live life slower than I do now (Tim might have me committed, or commit himself) but I want to have my breakfast outside on a beautiful day, continue to enjoy the laughter of my children, hold hands with my husband more often, pass the time with family and my friends and to cherish them more; take in the beauty that each day brings. I don’t want so much scheduling, spontaneity is wonderful. I want to continue to be open and receptive and see the beauty in everyone; to enjoy the ride more than the destination.
Q7: Tell us about that emotional day, the day that we decided to leave.
AA: Well it was a whirlwind of confusion, totally unexpected and full of tears. It wasn’t what we had planned, obviously, but it had to be done this way given the circumstances. I knew the day would come when we had to leave our life in Firenze and say goodbye to our friends and all that we’ve known for the last year. It is very sad to say goodbye but in all the sadness you also feel and overwhelming amount of love, and this won’t ever go away. I guess you can’t have one with out the other. I feel so lucky.
AA: As for the emotional aspect I don’t see a negative impact from living abroad this past year. I don’t view missing your family and friends as a negative. In my opinion it is s an experience in which we learn to recognize and go through what we are feeling. Once this happens and we experience the feelings, we ultimately grow from it. I’ve seen this process occur Trey and Olivia.
Trey and Olivia have had an incredible experience this year while in Italy. They have experienced a different life in a different land and have proven once again that they are amazing children who embraced this experience. They both grew immensely at ISF and both have told me that it is the best school they have ever gone to. Their appreciation for good, fresh, simply prepared food has changed them forever! So much so that they have their own opinions as to which restaurants serve the best pasta, rosticciana, steak, lamb, seafood etc. etc.! Consequently, they will also voice their opinion when the food is not to their satisfaction – this is fantastic for me! They both have developed an appreciation for the natural beauty of Italy, the soft rolling hills of the Tuscan country side, flowers in bloom and old rock walls. Trey takes in the architecture and Olivia chooses her favorite trees in the forest of the castle. Daily life for them was not the same “routine” as in Thousand Oaks. The strolls to dinner in the center, crossing the Arno, laughing with delight at how hard the rain is coming down on us while under our umbrellas, trying a new flavor in gelato……………….it has been life changing for them. Having a greater impact on them though is the friendships we have formed. Most of our friends do not speak English, and in the beginning it was a bit foreign for Trey and Olivia but as time passed, they discovered ways to communicate. TIC TAC TOE is a big one (just ask Olivia and the Mr. Italias!) The kids would often draw pictures for friends of ours who are special to them thereby communicating these feelings in a drawing. After time passes, you get to know someone without having to say it in words all the time because you can’t! You become more observant of body language, facial expressions and tend to look longer into their eyes and then you really know how they feel and with this brings comfort. Every time we are with our friends, they are very excited to see Trey and Olivia and they let it be known with big smiles and big hugs from the heart! Gifts are a big thing with the Italians we’ve befriended! Much to my disapproval, they would come with gifts in hand for the kids! I soon realized that is a sign of their fondness for the Trey and Olivia and therefore could not be disgruntled by it. Little gifts carefully thought out and from the heart.
Q2: You have said that you didn’t feel like you were “Finished” with Florence yet. Do you still feel that way?
AA: Yes, very much so. I feel as though my affair with Firenze and all it has for me is not over, this brings me comfort, knowing that I will be back.
Q3: How did your year in Italy differ from what you expected?
AA: Well, those who know me know I’m not one for expectations. I don’t get excited before a vacation.. The excitement for me happens as I am there, living it, feeling it. I don’t know how to have expectations from something I’ve never experienced before and don’t want to put expectations upon it for fear missing something because it wasn’t part of my expectations (does that make sense?) With that said, this has been to date one of the best years of my life.
Q4: If you could do it all over again, would you AND what would you do differently?
AA: Yes I would do it all over again. Differently? Some things would be different by default because we already have had the experience of living abroad therefore some things we are wiser to.
Q5: Who will you miss the most and why?
AA: For me it is impossible to be placed in a garden filled with beautiful flowers and asked to only choose one. Friends are like with flowers, beautiful and fragrant, touching your heart in their own unique way.
Q6: As you return home, what new wisdom do you bring with you that you will try to use to have a better life in California?
AA: I can’t live life slower than I do now (Tim might have me committed, or commit himself) but I want to have my breakfast outside on a beautiful day, continue to enjoy the laughter of my children, hold hands with my husband more often, pass the time with family and my friends and to cherish them more; take in the beauty that each day brings. I don’t want so much scheduling, spontaneity is wonderful. I want to continue to be open and receptive and see the beauty in everyone; to enjoy the ride more than the destination.
Q7: Tell us about that emotional day, the day that we decided to leave.
AA: Well it was a whirlwind of confusion, totally unexpected and full of tears. It wasn’t what we had planned, obviously, but it had to be done this way given the circumstances. I knew the day would come when we had to leave our life in Firenze and say goodbye to our friends and all that we’ve known for the last year. It is very sad to say goodbye but in all the sadness you also feel and overwhelming amount of love, and this won’t ever go away. I guess you can’t have one with out the other. I feel so lucky.
One Final Tuscan Photo Journey
It was always in my mind that I would have the time to meander through the rolling hills of Tuscany one last time before I left. One final photo journey as Primavera (Spring) turned to D’estate (Summer). I’m so glad that I didn’t wait till that final week that we planned to be in Florence. It would have never happened.
Photography is all about timing because lighting is so important to a great photo. Many people think that shooting photography on a sunny day represents ideal conditions. In my mind, the only day worse than a sunny day (When it comes to photography of course) is an overcast day. Both represent a lack of lighting contrast. My preferred days for shooting are always partly cloudy days, because the lighting contrast (Especially in early morning and late day) can be dramatic. From there it’s all about timing and sometimes you have to wait a bit for the lighting to change.
These are luxuries that one can’t afford when on a short vacation. You have to take what Mother Nature gives you on that particular day and must be mindful of the needs of family and other desired items on your holiday itinerary. One of the truly wonderful things about this past year has been my ability to shoot photos without having to be rushed.
In early June, I woke very early to watch the Lakers get destroyed by the Celtics in the NBA finals. The game ended at about 5:30 am and the sun was starting to rise in the distance beyond our kitchen window. For the first time in nearly two weeks the skies did not threaten rain. Today was the day…
As I drove our Fiat Punto south towards Sienna I thought about how much I love to explore with my camera without time limits. I meandered down old country roads on foot and ventured over hilltops to view the hidden valleys that had lied beyond my view when driving by in the past.
This is my form of meditation in many ways and a day that I will always cherish about this past year in Italy. I’d like to take you through some of the photos of my day alone in Toscana. I will reflect upon them frequently when I have days of melancholy for what is surely one of the most beautiful places in the World. I hope you enjoy…
Photography is all about timing because lighting is so important to a great photo. Many people think that shooting photography on a sunny day represents ideal conditions. In my mind, the only day worse than a sunny day (When it comes to photography of course) is an overcast day. Both represent a lack of lighting contrast. My preferred days for shooting are always partly cloudy days, because the lighting contrast (Especially in early morning and late day) can be dramatic. From there it’s all about timing and sometimes you have to wait a bit for the lighting to change.
These are luxuries that one can’t afford when on a short vacation. You have to take what Mother Nature gives you on that particular day and must be mindful of the needs of family and other desired items on your holiday itinerary. One of the truly wonderful things about this past year has been my ability to shoot photos without having to be rushed.
In early June, I woke very early to watch the Lakers get destroyed by the Celtics in the NBA finals. The game ended at about 5:30 am and the sun was starting to rise in the distance beyond our kitchen window. For the first time in nearly two weeks the skies did not threaten rain. Today was the day…
As I drove our Fiat Punto south towards Sienna I thought about how much I love to explore with my camera without time limits. I meandered down old country roads on foot and ventured over hilltops to view the hidden valleys that had lied beyond my view when driving by in the past.
This is my form of meditation in many ways and a day that I will always cherish about this past year in Italy. I’d like to take you through some of the photos of my day alone in Toscana. I will reflect upon them frequently when I have days of melancholy for what is surely one of the most beautiful places in the World. I hope you enjoy…
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